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International Business PS
#1
Hi there dudes and dudettes Smile Can u just spare a minut and give me some input on my PS!
Please bare with me as English is not my mother tongue and some grammatical errors may occur....

Personal Statement
Uppsala, Sweden January 11th 2010

It is unquestionable that a know how of the international business market and the global economy is more valuable today than ever. Examining any media today about the global economic situation tells that there is obviously something wrong in our system. My own theory is in order to fix all of this and make sure that there is minimal risk for this to happen again is to start to cooperate and adding people with a fresh way of thinking. This is the standard procedure when a company looses its profits and credibility in the business. And this should be the procedure when it comes to today's situation. Why am I saying this? Well in order to add people with a fresh way of thinking is first to educate them and equip them with the right set of tools. It is now where I think I come in. I believe that we who is relatively new to this subject can learn from yesterdays problems and become tomorrows entrepreneurs. How the business subject set a spark in my interest and my compassion for this subject, has to do with several things. The first thing is the entire global situation, second thing is my previous job and the third thing is that I realize how much economy matters to our lives. In my previous job where I worked as an Operational manager for a customer service comapny, I had to deal with economy and begun to think like a business person. Negotiating, calculating, analyzing and making decisions developed the business person within. It all made sense to me and it became the most natural thing in the world for me. I belonged in this sector and I realized that this is what I wanted to do for the rest of my life. Unfortunately life is just as twisty as a business cycle, sometimes it goes up, and sometimes it goes down. So in august 2009 , my company went almost bankrupt and I was without a job. It wasn't devastating for me as it was for many others, as I saw it as a fresh start. I started to read about going to university to expand my knowledge and to become this entrepreneur I mentioned before. I read about the schools in the UK and how reputable they where. So here I am writing this statement and hoping for a better future.

In college I read computer science as a major but I wasn't quite so interested in that subject. And I realized during the second year that this is nothing I wanted to in the future. But I have been taught in the early age that whatever the knowledge is it might be useful. So read and learn. And so I did. I graduated from college in 2006 as a top of my class.
The same summer as I graduated I was drafted to the army and was assigned as an Armored infantry solider. The whole army experience was a mind boggling and an eyeopening experience. It was nothing as I ever expected. After three months of service I was promoted to Commander for my infantry group. As time went on I discovered that leadership is something within me and something that I am good at. It was hard and tough to lead others but as time went on it became a natural part of me. The good effort was payed of and I got promoted to Infantry Sergeant in June 2007. The same month my service ended, with this experience with me it enhanced my job search and my confidence in the civilian life. I started working as a customer service agent and worked myself up the career ladder and ended up managing the Real Time manager group. The youngest manager ever in this company, and that is something that I am really proud of!
Today I am a freelance representative for the Trade Council of Iraq where I talk to different exporters and manufacturers of staple food and export the negotiated goods to Iraq. This is something I just started with and still have a lot to learn. In my spare time I have a small web shop where I sell different products from China . That is just something to keep the pace up and enhance my trading skills.

Finally I would like to say; " In order to walk the million mile walk, you have to start with one step". My first step is to go to university, and open up the world of knowledge.
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#2
very nice, the quote at the end is killer! Smile
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#3
gud closing sentence
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#4
It feels like you're just rattling off your life story - although your achievements are excellent. Smile

I think you should pick about 4 things you think heavily contributed to your decision to do International Business and talk about them in 4 paragraphs. The final two should be used to explain your past successes.

As I said - that's me personally. There needs to be more paragraphs overall though. It's quite tedious to read that much information.

Sorry I haven't said enough praise, but I hope my criticisms prove useful.
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#5
I am also not a native speaker, but I think you beat me at least in written English~
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