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my personal statement
#1
Will you guyz please go through my personal statement and give me some feedback



Academically, I have always been a very determined and studious individual, hence why I knew that a degree in a university would be the definitely next step. I have a broad interest in many subject areas yet fell drawn towards a business-oriented degree. Business field is a unique and fascinating career, which brilliantly combines my passion with my desire to work with people. I had a vein of a businessman since my childhood, when I used to sell my old and unwanted stuff successfully to my friends. Since taking the subject at A-level my interest has grown and matured and I am able to view many businesses analytically and make suggestions regarding possible involvement.

My parents had worked in business fields for many years. I always kept a close watch on their work and also helped my dad in their business. This made me realize that this fascinating and unpredictable business world is perfectly suitable for me. I studied business studies and Math P&S at AS level. I wanted to carryon studying these subjects at A2 level but unfortunately business studies clashed with math P&S. I was really very disappointed because I needed atleast two A2 levels for my course in university. I was determined to not let that disappointment come in my way and I finally came up with the solution. I chose business studies and decided to do AS Statistics in college and A2 Statistics privately. I talked to my teacher and he totally agreed with me because Statistics was not only one of my favourite parts of study but I also attained good grade in Statistics in the past. My teacher advised me to do all three modules of AS Statistics in January and then all modules of A2 Statistics in June. He also assured me of his help whenever I need it.

My earliest childhood memories of going to the school was very scary because of the thought of the teachers embarrassing me in front of the class for not knowing the answers to their questions, and colour of light represented the fear of learning. Then I realised that yellow epitomises the bright and glowing future that is ahead me if I tackle everything I do with perseverance and tenacity. My contribution in class discussions has constantly improved and this due to the fact that I am more committed to develop my knowledge. This has bred confidence within me to speak out in front of the whole class.

I have a great passion for cricket, a passion that can’t be matched, and I may not be good enough to crack the business on the pitch yet but I know that I do have the ability to run a club. Other than that I never miss any opportunity to travel and discover new things. Now I am planning to go for sky jumping next summer. I also do a part time job as a kitchen assistant. It enables me to meet new people and work with a small group of people in a pleasant environment. It also improved my communication skills and ability to handle extremely demanding work with full time education. I also do a voluntary work whenever I get a chance to do it. In october2005, earthquake in Pakistan shocked the world. Thousand died and 2.5 million people became homeless. They were in desperate need of aids. I raised £470 from my friends and family and gave it to the charity. I think this was the least I could do for those people.

I also have several plans about starting my own future business. My father is a successful man and my ultimate goal is to be more successful than him.

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#2
A little bit late but do you still want be to feedback on your personal statement?
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